theology of the table

March 19, 2018

theology of the table

The novelist Jonathan Safran Foer writes, "Nothing- not a conversation, not a handshake or even a hug- establishes friendship so forcefully as eating together."

As a Myers-Briggs ENFJ (I am a personality-test nut in case you haven't figured that out yet), I love being with people and gathering them. And I have come to realize one of the most significant ways to do so is around a table, sharing a meal.

Meals bring people together. My parents' are firm believers in the ministry of hospitality- ever since I was a young girl, I watched them gladly open their home to friends and acquaintances, neighbors and faraway visitors, like-minded people and others they had little in common with. I love that vision for the homestead- a place where people enter the door and are loved, delighted in, blessed and pointed to Christ.

I think many people are intimidated by the idea of hosting. They worry they have not mastered cooking, don't have the right size house or aren't extroverted enough. In reality, this exposes a confusion between entertaining and being hospitable. The distinction between entertainment and hospitality is often blurred, but they are fundamentally different.

Entertainment involves tedious preparation- a perfectly curated table, a menu to impress, a decked out doorstep. Entertainment is focused on the self. Hospitality, on the other hand, is about making guests feel at home. It is not focused on perfection, but vulnerability (which includes leaving signs of life around your home rather than jamming them into every closet and drawer). It is about being present at the table, not locked in the kitchen making sure your soufflé is just the right consistency. Hospitality is not bothered with your use of paper plates or fine china, or the menu consisting of leftovers or your finest execution of filet mignon. It is focused on the quality of the conversation rather than the quality of the presentation. Biblical hospitality is focused on others.

Shauna Niequist sums it up perfectly when she says, "True hospitality is when your guests leave feeling better about themselves rather than better about you."

I am not saying entertaining is unequivocally bad. Many people, my dear mother included, are gifted entertainers that I consider to simultaneously espouse a biblical model of hospitality. They take great pleasure in table setting and ambrosial meal plans, but they know the heart behind preparations is to bless others, not to impress them.

I love that Jesus Himself values meals; Scripture explains He came eating and drinking. Do we really think Jesus cared about the state of his hosts' house over the state of their hearts?

Hint: read the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10: 38-42.

Jesus shows so clearly the essence of Kingdom-focused hospitality in this passage. What a gift to be able to invite people into your abode, a vulnerable space filled with life in all its goodness and imperfections, to journey and learn together.

I believe there is something sacred about the table. It is a place which reminds us of our need for community; our undeniable communal nature. It is a place where we are reminded of our dependency on God for sustenance. It is a place where people of all walks of life- no matter the generation, belief system, culture- can join together, alluding to the transcendence of the gospel. It is a place of belonging and intimacy. Most importantly, it is a place that gives us a taste of the eternal feast that awaits us- a tangible reminder of the Kingdom banquet we will enjoy in God's presence forevermore.

The table, no matter how it is set or who sits around it, is a space where liturgy unfolds. As we break bread together and live out community is such a simple and rhythmic way, we are reminded powerfully of the sacramental truths of family, friendship, acceptance, faith, and love.