what i learned- spring 2018

Inspired by an author, blogger and podcaster I love, I try to take time to reflect on the things that marked on the past couple months. I did so in the Fall and the Winter and found it to be an important exercise of contemplation and introspection. Now that Springtime has come to an end, let me share some of the serious, silly, sacred and useful lessons of this past season. 

1. Slow mornings are a game-changer 

I used to think I should sleep as long as I could before running out the door in the morning. But I'm learning that waking up hours ahead of time is helpful to me personally. I don't do well with hectic mornings, and they seem to taint my day is some way. I love being able to wake up slowly, make my smoothie and read Scripture before tackling my day. Weekends involve morning trips to coffee shops. Basically heaven. 

2. Leon Bridges is a delight

My sis and I just bought tickets to Leon Bridges' concert in the Fall! Can't wait. His classic R&B music is nostalgic- nodding to the era of Motown, gospel and soul. You might recognize his piece called River. Lately, I've been listening to his song Shy nonstop- such a delight. 

Credit: Telegraph

3. Christian leadership is ultimately not about being relevant 

I have to thank Henri Nouwen for this one. My work with youth has been shifting to an approach that's less concerned with achieving flashy programming, but rather with meeting teens wherever they are (valley or mountaintop), and pointing them to Jesus from that vantage point. I'm learning that the name of Jesus is far more attractive and powerful than the coolest snack or the trendiest flyer, and we ought to depend on it more in Christian ministry. 

4. Travelling inspires me 

My recent travels to France and Belgium really inspired me. There is something about being far from the distractions of your day to day life that gets the creative juices flowing and invites you to leap out of your comfort zone. Whether you are immersed in natural beauty, meeting people of cultures entirely different than your own, working on your problem-solving skills when things go wrong, reading about the history and mores of the places you are in- all these components of travelling allow us to live out our nature as creative beings. The novelist Anita Desai said "Wherever you go becomes apart of you somehow" and I think she's right. 

5. Family takes priority

The past month was marked by a trip to Ottawa with my crew to celebrate my Nana's 80th birthday. My teenage years were marked by a major sense of FOMO, and an unwillingness to miss out on anything my friends were doing- so I skipped out on a lot of sweet moments with my family. I've sensed a shift in my outlook on this lately, wherein family takes priority (I think my sister being gone for the year reinforced this!). Don't get me wrong- I love my friendships, and value them deeply. But there is something sacred about being with the people God intentionally linked you with by blood or association, who will forever be connected to you historically. 

I was watching family home videos from the late 1990s with my sister and mom the other day, and a precious clip of me as a baby with my Grandpapa got me thinking. I realized to what extent I want to learn from my grandparents, laugh with them, walk with them- and that requires prioritizing them in my schedule- even if it means missing out on times with friends, or getting behind on some schoolwork. Next thing I knew, I was planning a trip to visit them in a couple weeks!

6. I'm guilt- driven, and shouldn't be 

I wrote about the sense of guilt I experience whenever I am happy here. Let's just say I had an "aha!" moment on the coast of France. It struck me to what extent I am a really guilt-driven person (saying yes to commitments out of guilt, for example). I am increasingly trying to bring my chronical sense of guilt to God, and have been reminded that He delights in me. That's reason to celebrate, not to feel guilty about!

7. The challenge with distance 

A friend of mine shared about her experience with long distance, and what she said really struck a chord with me. She explained that, in any kind of relationship, you will inevitably feel distance at some points. You're two distinct people, with different opinions, hopes, expectations, interests- so there will always be those moments when you sense a drift, even when you're in close proximity to each other. But at least there's the possibility of affirming that person with eye contact, or a hug, or the gentle touch of a hand (cue the Beatles "I want to hold your hand")- and that is a gift. When over 3,000 miles separate you from the person you're with, tangible closeness becomes a luxury. The distance is forcing the boy and I to be extra vigilant with communicating clearly how we are doing, and addressing the miscommunication, hurts, and all that jazz. Honestly, it's exhausting at times. But one thing I know for sure is that we never take proximity for granted, when we have a few days to enjoy it. I hope we never will. 

Credit: Wilder Heart Media

8. Iced lattes are my drug of choice lately 

I love them. Enough said. Also, coconut scones are pretty divine too. 

9. Commitment to stuff is important 

I read an amazing book during my trip called Uncomfortable: The Awkward and Essential Challenge of Christian Community which I will talk about in a future blogpost. A main premise of the book was the idea of counter-cultural commitment. Our culture tells us we have the freedom and right to leave our church, job, partner, friendship as soon as we don't get anything out of it (note: commitment to an abusive relationship is not what I am talking about). Author Brett McCracken writes that Christians shouldn't abide by this default: "Commitment to something despite discomfort challenges the default consumer posture of our culture." What a great way to strengthen our witness!

10. Flowers are the best

I love flowers. I have friends who think bouquets of flowers are a ridiculous thing to buy, as they won't last more than a week or so, but I disagree. There is something about lush bouquets that brighten my mood and day, and I have loved walking through the garden markets just looking at the diversity of hues and shapes. Peonies are my absolute favorite, and I have looked out the window every day this week to see if they bloomed yet! 

What did you learn this Spring? Feel free to share!